Will You Miss Me When I’m Gone?

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To some this may sound like a trick question, to others it is serious thought. I tend to fall in to the second camp. I really wonder how much would I be missed if I were no longer around. I often wonder what kind of legacy will be left behind by me. I wonder will there be enough people at my funeral to even carry my casket. I wonder a lot of different things about what the lives of those I love will be like if I were to pass away.

Now, I have been writing everyday minus one for the last 62 days, I wonder if you all would miss me if I were gone. I am curious if I have left a small mark on your world, that has left and indelible mark on you in some way? Everyone wants to be remembered for doing something good.

It may be selfish, but I want to be remembered for making difference in the world through my words. Not because they are my words, but because every time I write I try to offer hope and encouragement through the power of Jesus Christ. There is no way I have been able to do all the things in this life I have done without His guidance and help.

So it is not a legacy of me I want to leave behind but a spreading of the good news of Jesus. I want people to say of me, what they said of the disciples, “That He has been with Jesus.” And as it is being said God would be glorified and in the end I would be like John the Baptist. “He must increase, and I must decrease.”

If I haven’t left that kind of impact then what has my life been for? What is it all about? So I guess in reality while I want to be a little selfish and know if people would miss me if I were gone the biggest question is did I represent Christ well while I was here? If I were to stop writing tomorrow, would the work I have created be a good discipleship tool, or just more junk clogging up the net?

Question: Do you think I have made a difference for the Kingdom of God? How can I do more?

4 Comments

  1. keeja22

    Paul,
    It is very clear to me that you love the Lord and are striving to please Him. It is also on my heart to encourage you in your journey. I believe that you would be sorely missed by all those who know and love you.
    One observation that I have made, in reading your blog, is that you over use the word “I”. It seems to be the main focus of your writings. I realize that you are sharing your feelings , but it seems that you are haunted by so many worries. Is this because of your illness? I don’t know much about it.
    My prayer is that you will see that you are valued for who you are and for you to realize that no matter what people may think, God values you for your choice to follow Him.
    Keep up the good work and God Bless you in everything you do.
    Anne <

    Reply
    1. pmhorne

      Thank you for your comment Ms. Anne. “I” am sorry that it is over used. There is no other term to be thought of to use. It is mainly a place of expression for me, and what is on my own heart. I honestly don’t know how much of it stems from my illness there has been a haunting of my soul for a very long time. Thank you for your kind words, and I’m trying to live in the knowledge and grace of God daily. It’s hard work but necessary. Thanks again for your comment.

      Paul

      Reply
      1. keeja22

        Paul, I hope you didn’t take my comments as criticizing your writing.. I wasn’t doing that. It is just that you seem so troubled about things, My thoughts were to encourage you, not criticize you. Keeping you in my prayers and following your blog. Keep up the good work and congratulations on your being able to lead in your church.
        Anne<

        Reply
        1. pmhorne

          Not at all, I appreciate any input I can receive. I have been using the “I” more because of the devotional/journaling nature my writing has taken. I will always appreciate any prayers I can get. I thank you for your support. 😀 Please always feel free to comment. I did the “I” in the previous comment to be a little tongue in cheek, I guess it came off in a different manner and I apologize.

          Reply

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